Orthodoxic ~ Is that a word?

So we are leaving the Church a different way than normal as I need to get gas like Now! Our little parish is in a curve and the children really haven't seen what's around the bend even though it's practically right across the street. So we turn out of the parking lot and Isaiah almost immediately spots another church across the way. He's says "Wow, there's another church right across the street from ours!" Me- "Yes, Isaiah there is." Isaiah- "Huh, well I would still want to go to St. Mary's because that church isn't as Orthodoxic as our's is."

Jesus holding me close in Depression

As you know, I've been struggling with a bit of depression lately and though I'm doing better and I'm doing really good at not allowing despondency to get it's grip on me, I still have days that aren't exactly the best. Yesterday was one of them.

I took Faith to Horse Quiz Bowl Practice and while out I had to go by and get a gift card and mail off a package to Christian since he will not be home for the holidays. Now I was already feeling a bit lowly - but I had parked way out in the parking lot with no other cars really close by to make it easy for me to pull out of this otherwise crazy parking lot. So I get in the car and crank up when this guy comes whipping in and pulls into the space *right in front of me* ... I mean really -with all the other spaces available and you have to pull in right in front of me, blocking my way out that I had so carefully planned, really? So I took a deep breath, backed out and found a different way out. It wasn't so bad, it was just a little frustrating.

So I headed to the post office to mail off the package that was now complete. Got it mailed and then I could not for the life of me back out of my parking spot due to traffic and several other rude people. I finally back out due to the generosity of a fellow driver, God bless him, and headed out of the parking lot back to Faith. On the way out there is a sign that reads "Buckle up! Someone needs you!" When I read this, it wasn't a few minutes later and the tears started coming... I got to thinking - ha, no one actually *needs* me. Everyone would be able to get on just fine without me, in fact they'd probably have much smoother lives without me. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't contemplating anything drastic - been there done that and it isn't fun to be in that place at all and I've determined to never be there again. No, I want to live, I want to be mommy, I want to show my children the awesomeness of God and worshipping Him, but when it boils down to it, no one needs me.

So I pick up Faith and we have to stop at the grocery store for bread and pepper. This is where the first sign I received that Jesus was holding me. I also needed two things - a Baker's Cup for dipping chocolate and some vanilla flavored marshmallows. So I get everything and I'm desperately searching the shelf of marshmallows praying I've just missed the vanilla flavored ones. There are the big ones, the mini ones, and the pink, strawberry flavored ones, but no vanilla flavored ones. But yet I keep looking - not sure why as I've looked over it several times already. There were more and more people showing up in just this little area so I had to move - and then there it was - the one and only bag of pink and green vanilla flavored marshmallows just sitting there on top of the pink, strawberry flavored ones. I mean how did I miss this bag?? All I could think of was "Thank You" and that apparently the little gift I wanted to give my family meant something - I mean it's nothing much but apparently it is enough to where the marshmallows were provided to me.

Then later I go to meet my friend I mentioned in the previous post that I hadn't seen in ages. My mood at the time is hard to describe and let's just say I needed a little something and it was definitely provided to me. I had absolutely nothing but green lights from my house to the highway, then when I got off the exit I was gifted with nothing but green lights all the way til the construction area. This gave me time to put a little lip gloss on and brush my hair and otherwise get to looking decently :) Anyway, so I really enjoyed our visit and then it hit me - she is the person I've been praying for - a friend that always gives sound advice, never judges, and prays and prays and prays. I have few friends like that in my life and I am soooo thankful the Lord "showed" her to me again.

So needless to say, Jesus was there with me all day long and was gently showing me I matter to Him. Thank You, Jesus, I needed that.

Update on St. Nicholas Cheer!

The other night we drove by the neighbor we shared our St. Nicholas basket with and saw they had a snowflake on their door - we were so excited to know they were spreading the cheer :)

So last night I went to meet a friend I have not seen in over 4 years (probably more like 6!). As I pulled out of the driveway I noticed the neighbor across the street had a snowflake on their door!! I felt like a little child on Christmas morning and called my girls to let them know - they found me amusing - and just as I was about to hang up I spotted yet another snowflake! Then they started getting a little excited :) I decided to drive through the neighborhood when I came home and I found 5 for sure snowflakes and a couple of others that could be! Now I'm really excited to do this next year much earlier in the season. The girls really want to do at least 2 baskets next year ... I don't know, maybe ...

On another note, Terry and I had the children clean out their closets as they had been piled high with stuff and junk and even trash from where we would tell them to clean their rooms. So last night I went in to go through all the clothes and weed out any that were too small, etc, as well as put away a whole load. I was flabbergasted - the children had made a huge pile of clothing that had been stuffed in the closets outside in the hall by the washer and we just sort of assumed the closets were halfway decently straightened up - WRONG!

I know you're thinking - does this have anything to do with St. Nicholas cheer - yes. Yes, it does...... So I had them come in and pull *everything* out of the closets and we all went through the piles together. I told them to start pulling out stuff they don't like, don't play with, don't want, and put it in a pile. They asked what we were going to do with the pile and I said the decent toys will be given to other children who have no toys and the broken ones in the trash. All of the sudden they really started weeding out those toys. Toys I never thought they would part with suddenly had phrases like "Another kid would probably enjoy that more I do" attached to them.

We wound up with a huge garbage bag full of toys and two smaller backpacks full of smaller toys. I'm going to go through them carefully and pull out any broken things and then I'm taking the bags to the women's shelter in town. They always need toys for the children to play with since they basically escaped their situations with nothing but the clothes on their backs. I was moved to tears at the giving hearts my children displayed. May they grow to have wonderfully giving spirits all the year long for all of their days!

Terrific Cookie Gifts!

Thanks to Sylvia at OrthodoxMom I was able to give my mailman and "trash guys" a little gift this year.... and many more to come :) Though it wasn't until I was posting this that I realized I didn't take a picture of the absolute final product as I finished so late last night I forgot!!

So I made Caramel Nut Balls, Peanut Butter Blossoms, Haystacks, and Oreo Truffles. I got tins, a pack of tissue paper, and ribbon from Dollar Tree for $1 each (total $6 plus tax). I baked the cookies, lined the tins with golden & cream tissue paper, put in 3-5 of each cookie, wrapped the edges of the tissue paper over the top, put on the tops, took two pieces of ribbon, criss-crossed them, and secured them on the bottom with hot glue since I couldn't find the tape anywhere! Then I made a little note card telling them of our appreciation, listed allergens for each cookie, and tucked it under the ribbon. I placed the mailman's in the mailbox and set up a little table with a note attached for the trash guys near our trash can by the side of the road.

Now I'll quit boring you with words and get to the pictures - which are not top quality - I need to start having Tamara take the pictures with her new, wonderful camera!

St. Nicholas Day

{{I need to make mention that I have several posts up from the past several days and am working on more to get all caught up from this week!}}

Yes, I'm late getting all of this up ... I've been busy with Church, my father's side of the family's Christmas gathering (eatin' meetin' as my cousin has dubbed it), visiting my father and allowing the children to visit, taking care of sick family, cleaning house, baking cookies for presents, a little shopping, gymnastics, Horse Quiz Bowl practice, mailing presents to the son that won't be able to make it home for Christmas, and taking the teen girls to Matushka's so that Matushka can pack while they watch after the children. I'm just now sitting to do something for myself :) Isn't that the way it always is with mamas?

Anyway, here are a couple of shoes with their goodies that the children got to celebrate St. Nicholas day.




So the children were able to see their little gifts but they weren't happy about not being able to eat them since it was Sunday morning and we had communion. Oh well, yet another lesson in not getting what you want instantly.

We chose a new place to stand in Church to see about getting some of the unruly behavior under control - it dampened much of it but then again I need to wait for the newness of it to wear off before deciding that it's done much good. I had to get Isaiah up out of the chair several times - he would sit there with his coat on backwards and the hood over his face.
I tell you this because of something he said to me the night before as we left Church a different way as we needed to get gas. Nearly right across the street (we are in a curve and this is right around the curve where you can't visually see it) is a protestant church. So we turn right instead of left and Isaiah sees this church and exclaims, "UH, there is another church right close to our Church!" Me- "Yes, there is. There are a lot of churches in this area." Isaiah- "Huh, well, I still wanna go to St. Mary's cause that one isn't as Orthodoxic as St. Mary's."
All I could do was grin as my heart swelled.

Unfortunately we had to leave directly after communion, instead of sharing in the feast, as we had to head across the state straightaway to get to the Maner Family Christmas. For the very first time we were the first ones there. We had most everything set up by the time the next people started showing up. Only 28 were there :( For such a large family, it's always sad to see but about half (27 were missing). My dad of course was in the hospital. My uncle is in the hospital in Tennessee so his family stayed there to be near him as he is really bad off right now (I'm sadly anticipating another funeral soon)... that's 6 more. My brother had to work and his wife and children are sick (still) - that's 6 more. One of my cousins and his family simply didn't show up - said they were coming and then just didn't - no explanations and they are alright... that's 5 more. Then there's the cousin who shows up with her family if she doesn't have other social obligations to attend - which is unutterably sad to me.

After a fun-filled afternoon and simply reveling in the younger generations of cousins hanging out my little family went to see my father. It was the first time all of the children save Tamara have seen their grandfather since he went in the hospital over 2 months ago. We had to take them in one at a time. I stayed with him the whole time while my mom brought each one in to say hi for a few minutes. I love my daddy so much and it is so upsetting to see him like this. All I could do was cry as we walked out the door of the hospital. The children were somber as we left. They now understand how sick he is. And all because of a surgeon's mistake. I try so hard to remember that doctor's and surgeon's are also people and make mistakes just as the rest of us, but sometimes I still get upset about it.

I hope everyone had a wonderful St. Nicholas Day.

We made St. Nicholas's!

Just a little something I made for the children for St. Nicholas Day! I definitely learned a lesson ... you must use tacky/elmer's glue and NOT super glue! I thought it would be faster to use to glue on the staff's but unfortunately I wound up with a lot of mess and fingers covered in dried super glue :( Live and learn

Experiencing the Myrrh-streaming icon of St. Anna

I'm just now getting back in the habit of taking pictures so please forgive me for not having them all! Saturday we went to a friends house whom is not Orthodox and made St. Nicholas miter ornaments! They were so cute :) She was also introduced to stnicholascenter {.} org - which although is not Orthodox, is something she seemed interested in enough that she might take a peak-see a little further. All we can do is pray!

Anyway, she babysat the children while I went to a (homesteading/ preparedness)luncheon. While I was away she and the children made the ornaments. I decided at the last minute to let her keep them - it just felt right, even though my intentions were for them to be hung on our tree here at home.

We stayed there until Terry met us there when he got off work. Then we headed to the Church to see the icon of St. Anna streaming myrrh! What an experience that was. It smelled heavenly and was simply amazing to witness. My cousin asked me about it after Terry mentioned it to him. Please pray this particular cousin becomes interested and seeks the true Church! He is an upstanding Christian man, a published author (www.slaveofchrist.com), and is certainly after bringing up his family in Christ. If he were to convert, more family would pay attention and take a credible look at the Orthodox Church. As it is one cousin is Greek Orthodox and I am Russian Orthodox. But we are looked at as "free-spirits" and those that like to "push the limits of mainstream ideas" *sigh* All I can do is pray and live the way I am supposed to while allowing God to use me or not in their lives. Have faith, have faith, have faith ...